For Want Of A Usagi
by InvidHellCat2
Summary: Rei angrily storms out of a study session because she's sick of hearing Usagi talk about Mamoru, Everybody gets worried about her, but can Mianko help the hot-headed fire Senshi cool off and settle down long enough to hear what the real problem is?


**STANDARD LEGAL DISCLAIMER/AUTHOR'S NOTE: SAILOR MOON AIN'T MINE NEVER HAS BEEN NEVER WILL BE. SAILOR MOON WAS CREATED BY NAOKO TAKEUCHI. THIS FANFIC IS YURI SO IF YOU'RE OFFENDED BY SHOUJO-AI/YURI THEN DON'T READ OTHERWISE I HOPE YOU ENJOY. **

**FOR WANT OF A USAGI**

**BY: INVID HELLCAT (4/4/13)**

Rei Hino stood alone on a bridge just above a small stream it was late evening but it would still be several hours before the sunset. She looked in every direction seeing nobody around she clenched her fists and slammed them down against the railing of the bridge. She was frustrated beyond belief, but it was a frustration born of jealousy. Rei had been harboring this jealousy for a while now ever since she broke up with Mamoru and Usagi stated dating him instead.

The girls had all met at Ami's house, for supposedly a study group, but as usual they wound up doing almost everything but study. The girls had talked about their plans for the weekend mostly. Usagi mostly talked about how she and Mamoru had a date, she was going to spend the night at his apartment. After she said that Rei had heard enough and somewhat angrily excused herself saying she had a lot of chores to do at the shrine. Of course Rei had no intention of going home just yet, she needed some time to herself. Some time to think, settle down, and just blow off some steam.

Rei growled to herself as she once again pounded her fists on the bridge railing. She knew that this was not very productive; however, she also felt like she didn't have very many other options.

"Mam-chan this, Mamo-chan that, Mamo-chan, Mamo-chan, Mamo-chan. I'm so sick and tired of hearing that from Usagi, doesn't she have any idea about how I feel? Who the hell cares about destiny and fate. I know I love Usagi more than Mamoru does." Rei was on the verge of shouting at the stream below her. She felt a tear roll down her cheek.

She rubbed her eyes she wasn't going to cry. She was better than that. She wasn't the whiney little crybaby that Usagi was. No, she was far more mature than the whiney little crybaby that she loved more than life itself. She was so angry right now just because she knew that Mamoru and Usagi loved each other because fate and destiny said so, not necessarily because they wanted to. Rei on the other hand loved Usagi because she wanted to love her. At least that's what she had convinced herself of.

'Usagi, why can't you see me in the way you see Mamoru? Why can't you see my heart?' Rei thought to herself as she now grabbed the railing so tightly that her knuckles were turning white. The thing that made this even worse was the fact that Rei knew she had no one to talk to. There was nobody that would understand her pain and heartache.

Before she knew it the sky was darkening as the sun was now starting to set, Rei was somewhat startled to find out that she had been standing in one spot for so long just lost in her own thoughts. She still didn't feel like going home though. But she could've sworn she heard a voice from behind her.

"Rei, Rei you alive Rei?" The voice asked, if there had been any more concern in that voice it would've been a physical force.

"Yes, Minako I'm alive, and awake, just got a lot on my mind is all." Rei replied without turning around.

The flatness of Rei's voice made Minako's worry double. She had been worried ever since Rei had excused herself from the meeting. Nobody really believed that Rei was going home to do chores that she had in all likelihood done before she even left for school that morning. But, they also felt it might be best if Rei was given some space before anybody tried talking to her.

"Rei, there's something on your mind and seriously bothering you. We all could tell when you left, since you nearly stormed out like a squirrel into hotel." Minako said seeing her friend tense up at her words.

"You mean like a bat out of hell, Minako." Rei corrected, then continued. "And, no nothing is bothering me, I'm fine." Rei said even though it was one of the most blatant lies she ever told in her life. "Perfectly fine." She added for emphasis.

'Who are you trying to convince that nothing's wrong Rei? Me or yourself?' Minako thought to herself before she continued speaking again.

"Rei you don't sound at all convincing. Please Rei, tell me what's wrong. I'm not the only one who's worried."

Rei looked away from Minako and instead looked at the water beneath them. Again she could feel tears stinging her eyes. She was desperately trying to hold back the tears but it was a battle she was going to lose. She put both her arms over the railing as the tears now freely flowed down her cheeks. She still wasn't answering she knew that there was no way Minako could understand, so it wasn't worth saying anything to her.

Rei felt a hand on her shoulder and Minako's voice pleading with her to explain what the problem was. She then felt Minako remove her hand from her shoulder and instead her arms were now around Rei's waist. "Rei I'm not going to let go of you until you tell me what's wrong." Minako softly whispered. Rei's first reply was inaudible then she snapped a reply.

"Dammit Minako let go of me, you can't understand what I'm going through anyways." Rei said angrily trying to get out of her friend's embrace.

The harder Rei tried to get out the tighter Mianko's hug became. Finally Rei just turned herself around and fully embraced the blonde crying harder than she had in many years, and resting her head on her shoulder. She felt Minako softly rub her back, while trying to find the right words to settle her down. After what seemed like hours Rei finally lifted her head off of Mianko's shoulder. "Now please Rei, tell me what's wrong even if you don't think I'll understand." Minako asked one more time.

"I'm heartbroken Minako, heartbroken and jealous, I'm so sick of Usagi talking about Mamoru, I'm so sick of her ignoring my feelings for her. She's so damn clueless about how much I really love her. But, I don't expect you to understand that, I mean how can you, you've got Makoto, you've got somebody that loves you in the same way as you love them." Rei ranted a look of jealous anger in her eyes as she spoke. She heard Minako sigh after she finished speaking.

"No, Rei I do understand perfectly how you feel." Minako started, Rei tried to interrupt, but Minako quieted her a finger. "Let me finish Rei before you say anything else. Don't you remember Allen? He was the first person I truly fell in love with, but yet, I had to watch as he fell in love with my best friend, my big sister-figure, Katrina. And she with him, I was horribly heartbroken by that. I left England because of that, I couldn't look at them any more without being jealous, and I hated it, I loved both of them so much, I still do love them, but Allen chose her and it stings to this day, so yes I have Mako-chan now but I still have that pain from Allen in my memory." Minako said as Rei was now silent and looking away from her blonde-haired friend.

Rei didn't know what to think now, she was so completely convinced that nobody least of all Minako, could understand her. And, yet she now realized that Minako would know perhaps better than anybody. She felt awful for thinking such things. Rei just couldn't understand how she could think that her friends especially one of her best friends couldn't understand her, she just felt so horribly foolish right now. Rei did find her voice again, although it was a bit shaky.

"I'm sorry Minako, I'm sorry for doubting you. I guess I just got so lost in my own pain I couldn't see or think straight." Rei said her voice sounding like something in-between a sigh and a whisper.

Minako accepted the apology and then told Rei that was probably time to head home. Rei nodded in agreement and the two friend started off towards Rei's home. The trip was made in silence it's wasn't an uncomfortable or awkward silence, but it was both girls felt a necessary one. The first words spoken by either girl was when they got to the front door of Rei's home when Minako asked Rei if she just wanted to straight to her bedroom or bathroom for a shower. Rei said that she just wanted to get to bed. Minako walked her friend to her bedroom. After Rei had laid down Minako told her to sleep well and gave her a small kiss on the forehead. Rei smiled at the kiss and told Minako thanks for being such a good friend to her, and for her to have a good night as well. Before she left Minako asked if it would be ok if she used the phone before she left. Rei told her told it was fine.

Minako picked up the phone and dialed Usagi's number. After a couple of rings she heard Usagi answer. Minako told Usagi that Rei was fine, and in bed sleeping. She related some of what had Rei so out of sorts. Minako could tell that Usagi was starting to tear up on the other end, but told her not to. After all it wasn't her fault that Rei had fallen for her, nor was it Rei's fault it's just one of those things that happen.

Later that night Rei's sleep had become rather fitful. She was tossing and turning due the rather disturbing nature of her dream. In her dream she had finally confessed to Usagi, but Usagi turned her down saying that she couldn't love Rei like that. Rei pled with her but Usagi would not relent, saying that she could only ever love Mamoru like that, and she was sorry. Also in the dream Usagi told Rei that she would never speak to her again, Rei just fell to the floor sobbing.

Rei awoke to find herself covered in a cold sweat, and just repeating Usagi's name in a voice wracked with pain and tears. When Rei was fully awake she looked over at her clock and saw that was only two in the morning. She slowly made her way out her bed. When she got the other side of the bed she noticed that there was someone on the floor apparently sleeping. She looked down in the dim light that was making its way through the curtains.

"Usagi!" Rei shouted hoping against hope that the girl she loved had somehow made her way to her house in the middle of the night. But, when the figure started to stir she noticed that it wasn't Usagi but Minako instead. Rei bowed her head sorry that she had woken her.

Minako sat up fully and rubbed her eyes. "Rei, what are you doing awake?" Minako asked through a yawn.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to wake you, but what are you doing here I thought you went home." Rei said as she sat next to her blonde friend.

"I was going to but after talking to all the girls they said it might be a good idea if I just stayed here just in case. They're all worried sick about you. I hope you don't mind." Minako replied.

Rei just shook her head in reply. In truth she was happy that somebody was with her even if it wasn't the person she wanted to be with her. Minako was such a good friend to Rei, sometimes she wondered if she really deserved such a friend. Rei then started giggling a bit. Which felt refreshing after all the jealousy, anger, and angst she had been feeling.

"You know Minako I occasionally I wonder what would've happened if I had fallen for and confessed to you, rather than falling for Usagi." Rei said after her little giggle fit.

Minako giggled a bit herself before she replied. She felt quite relived that Rei seemed to be doing better.

"I honestly don't know it would've depended on whether or not Mako-chan got me first." Minako replied. This caused both girls to laugh again.

The two friends sat up for a little while longer and just chatted. Nothing in particular just whatever they felt like. After a yawn from both girls they decided to get back to sleep. They told the other sweet dreams, and they'd talk more in the morning. Rei laid down in her bed thinking to herself how lucky she was to have such good friends, not just Minako but all of the them. Her dreams the rest of the night were very happy and pleasant.

Rei was the first to awaken before she got out of bed she looked down and saw that Minako was still soundly sleeping. She had to admit that she looked really cute right now. Rei knew she was blushing with that thought. She shook her head to clear her mind, but also had to wonder just how Makoto felt whenever she woke up next to Minako whenever they stayed the night at the other's place. Rei could feel a deeper blush creep on to her face as she let her mind drift and wondered just how far the two of them had gotten. Rei's next thought that was she had better take a cold shower before she too lost in such thoughts. She knew that she shouldn't think such perverted things about her friends, but she was also finding it very had not to think that way at the moment.

Rei got out of the shower and saw Minako just coming out of her bedroom. She told her blonde friend good morning, and asked her if she slept well. Minako replied that she slept fine, and asked Rei how she was feeling. Rei told her that she was feeling much better than she had been and invited Minako to stay for breakfast. The two friends ate breakfast together and Rei told Minako of the dream that she had. They both agreed that there was no way that Usagi of all people would ever act like that. Minako just chalked the dream up to Rei's unrequited love, and the natural fear most people feel when they do fall for a close friend. Fear not so much of being rejected but fear of losing the friendship all together.

A couple hours later Minako told Rei that she had to head home, and then she was going to have dinner with Makoto. But, to call her if she needed somebody to talk to. Rei promised that she would, or if not her then Ami. Minako was glad to see that Rei really was feeling better but she also had a feeling that this wasn't quite over yet, nor would it be until Rei and Usagi talked things over, but the important thing was Rei no longer felt as though she had to carry this burden all by herself.

Rei did a few chores that she needed to take care of then headed out to the store to buy a few things that were needed for dinner. Along the way to the store she stopped by a little outdoor café. She noticed that Ami and Michiru were sitting together having lunch. Rei knew that Ami and Michiru had become closer in recent weeks, but was surprised to see them together. She shook her head. Michiru was dating Haruka, there's no way that Michiru was going behind Haruka's back was there? And, Ami would never do that to Haruka either. No, it had to be just a simple lunch outing as friends. Rei chided herself for even thinking of such things. She continued on to the store leaving her friends to continue their lunch in peace.

Later in the day Rei was laying on her bed reading some of her manga. The last twenty-four hours now just seemed like one massive blur. But, she knew that her friends would always be there for her. She knew that sooner or later she'd have to talk to Usagi, if for no other reason her own piece of mind. One thing was all too clear now, as if there had really ever been any doubt, but Usagi would always love Rei, maybe not in the way Rei wanted but it would be enough. Being best friends with Usagi Tsukino was maybe in some ways even better than having her as a lover. But, Rei did have a sneaking suspicion that some jealousy would always remain, however; she'd never let that interfere wither her duties or friendship with her Princess.

THE END.

End Notes: In case you're wondering NO I'm NOT breaking up Haruka and Michiru, but I do plan on having Ami and Michiru become closer friends. Anyways I hope you were able to enjoy this fan fiction. Please R&R I'd love to get some feedback. Peace out for now. Invid HellCat. (4/10/13)


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